Halloween

It seems kind of sad to find myself sitting at home alone on October 31st, a very important night of drinking and making a tit of oneself (I have nothing against Halloween, nor the concept of Halloween, I love getting drunk and making a tit of myself (Preferably in that order)). I was, however at a 21st last night, leaving me with reduced financial status and very low motivation to get up and do anything, but also a fairly acceptable reason to not be out tonight. The morning after Halloween being a day of work and college (a travesty in the eyes of most students and anyone who loves going out on the drink, leaving their dignity safely tucked away at home), I decided it was best for my lecturers, classmates, employers, and most importantly myself, that i have a quiet night in.

Watching Spiderman, I can think of well over 100 films more appropriate for RTE to display on Halloween. What happened to films like Hocus Pocus, or the Nightmare Before Christmas? Albeit Spiderman is a popular costume, I can't help thinking that an actual Halloween film would have drawn a bigger audience. The more I think about this, the less I want to watch Spiderman, so off it goes.

The night is punctured by the perpetual pop and squeal of fireworks, and I can't help wonder how many brave eyebrows will be lost to the fires of the orient tonight. Not mine! Although once a roman candle fell over and scorched my shoe. A few days later my mother was moving my shoes from the front door hallway (she hates that), and she smelled the smoke off one of them. When questioned about my addiction to cigarettes, and how a 13 year-old managed to obtain sufficient funds to feed his 'habit', I replied that a firework had 'got me'. The next year I was conveniently 'grounded to protect myself from the highly dangerous 'explosives'. We had sparklers. It was not awesome. But at least there were Halloween-appropriate films on television back then!


We would always watch Hocus Pocus on Halloween morning, as we had it on VHS recorded, with commercials from 1994, which I always found ridiculous and ancient. One year I accidentally recorded over it with Starship Troopers. I watched it once and then threw the tape in the bin, lest my mistake be punished. Haven't watched it with any regularity since then, but can still remember think Sarah Jessica Parker was hot. Since then, it's like there's been someone tracing over her face with a marker of increasing size. I don't like it! She does get a fair amount of abuse online though, so I won't mention her again...probably.
I do miss trick-or-treating though! I can't wait to have kids so I can take them out and rob their sweets. If that takes too long though, I might volunteer at an orphanage one night a year. I say 'volunteer', but I would be getting a cut of the haul. I'd reckon they would need some convincing, but I'm really doing it for the kids! ...and my 10% cut. That's what I think Brangelina and Madonna are up to! It is a long-term investment though, but when their children have children and adopt dozens more, they can take all the grandchildren trick-or-treating and make a killing!
Like a little army of horror!

If I had enough kids they would totally be wearing costume sets! Like if I had four boys, the TMNT's, two boys and two girls, the Scooby Gang, a billion kids, China. The list goes on! I'm absolutely dictating what costumes they wear, for at least the first ten years of their life, hopefully more. At a guess, they will be pawns, mere add-ons of my costume, like Pokemon to my Ash costume!
...Ok, six kids it is!